Thursday, September 8, 2011

not a bed of roses..


i have a confession to make.

i was not a good wife yesterday. as much as i love having visitors, i think we might have over-done it this year. our friends ask us all the time who is checking in our B&B this weekend. i love the arriving and the being here part but i don't like the cleaning, washing and ironing part. and i was coming down with a bug. and i had planned this week's menu a little too ambitiously. and i wanted to spend time with a girlfriend who is getting married soon. i want it to be special! and go for yummy desserts and manicures and explore town. there was way too much on my plate.

but the husband saw that coming. and despite his marathon training & work, he woke up 3 hours before me to clean the house. and then when i was at work, he folded the laundry, tidied some more, took care of little muu (who knew all day i was stressed and had gone to sit in the corner quietly) & bought happy flowers for me. on top of that, in the guest bedroom, he arranged a separate pot of flowers & put out fresh bedtime water. it was perfection. and rushed out so he could meet me for dinner, pick up some fresh ciabatta and desserts so our guest had a snack when she arrived.

all without being asked. kinda awesome right?

but of course i didn't know about it then. so, back to me being a bad wife.

we were at dinner... him a little frazzled and tired. i was cranky and tired. and it was only tuesday. and i had just read a whole bunch of scary food-related radioactive crap that freaked me out. (cos i don't know my cesium from sodium sillicate and damnit i just want to buy food from the supermarket). and i had so much to tell him but didn't know where to start. and out of the blue, it all just hit me hard.

i was all hyperventilating and teary and upset and all ARE YOU TURNING INTO ONE OF THOSE HUSBANDS? THAT DON'T NOTICE WHEN YOUR WIFE GOT A HAIRCUT? THAT ALL THAT IVE DONE IS NOT IMPORTANT? WE ARE EATING RADIOACTIVE MEAT!!! WHAT IS THIS ALL FOR?? IM NO LONGER IMPORTANT TO YOUUUU....

and of course, followed by the silent treatment. with occasional huge tear rolling down my face. and then the silent bike ride home with him quietly trailing behind me. then i stormed into the house. not noticing all the good things he's done. scooped up my dog and went straight to bed in a "musashi, its just you and me" spiel. i know.. im all drama when im in the zone.

and bless his heart, the husband let me be for a while, he cleaned up a little bit more, then he got musashi ready for our guest. and then he apologized (for not noticing my cute hair) and then took me for a walk and held my hand. and that made me feel a little better and the world was a much better place that evening. but holy smokes... definitely not my proudest moment.

im adding "be a kinder wife" to my to-do list this year. and boy do i have a lot to work on.

23 comments:

  1. Awww... hope u r feeling better babes *hugs*

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  2. *hugs* every one of us has ONE of those days. it's OH-KAY! as long as you acknowledge it and work on it, that's what matters! love you!

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  3. Hope you're feeling better babes, *hugs*

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  4. aww, we all have those days. feel better! :) ps...let's see that new haircut!?

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  5. big hugs. we all have been there, & it's okay. Maybe it's the hormones, or maybe it's just how women are wired. Most important is that you're aware and working on it.

    And that's why we love our men even more. For putting up with us despite all :)

    xx
    sherl

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  6. it's a very reflective blog entry and he'll appreciate it. afterall, both of you bond closer with the walk, isn't it?

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  7. its "one of those moments" right? where one gets cranky and felt unloved... but at least you know your hubby is always there and this incident does help to improve your r/s to a higher level isn't it? :)

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  8. this is exactly the dynamics between my fiancé and i. he's all drama-rama and reactive to everything. i let him rant and rave till the cows come home.

    you're not "insane", but just very passionate about things. masochist me thinks its the very same reason i fell in love with my man.

    it doesn't help that your husband and i are non- confrontational. but its a good balance duncha think? that yin yang stuff? ditto what everyone said big tight *huuuugles* :)

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  9. p.s: you know we're crazy in love with you "psychos" right? hyuk! hyuk! the husband will attest. Amen to that!!

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  10. @punkychewster

    i just rather it never happened! so scarily immature! :(

    love you too!

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  11. @Yingjie

    im betta thanks! :) and now daniel is coughing! :(

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  12. @miss.t

    yes definitely. but it doesn't look as good as it did when i came out form the salon!

    don't you hate it when that happens?

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  13. @S

    thanks so much honey!! i didn't know you had a blog! im hopping over now! :)

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  14. aw honeybunch, i'm sorry you were having a bad day but that doesn't make you a bad wife. just makes daniel a better husband jk. love you! feel better *HUGS*

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  15. @fenzc

    i know.. but it made me feel like an emo, pms-y bitch. :( gotta grow up!

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  16. @peanut-toes

    it really was!! i'll try to avoid behaving like that. its so unbecoming! :)

    xx

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  17. @guerrrilla

    gotta love you "non-psychos". i really can't imagine living with someone like me. i'd walk out in a second.

    but i guess that's the magic of love.

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  18. @E. Kay

    dude... how is it that you're so smart. your comment made me tear again! :)

    love ya!!

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  19. Arw. T would say, that's exactly how I am sometimes :P reason why we both are so similar. Cheer up. We all have our moments and D's a real trooper and sweetie. Like D, T's very patient with me and I thnk we just have to remind ourselves to try our best to be extra nice or just a simple sorry if we've over done the tantrum :)

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  20. @Andrea

    im working on the extra nice bit now!

    remind me to be grateful next time i get fussy ok? :)

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  21. Im like this too... And my boyfriend might be like your husband. Had something similar to your story just yesterday.
    XO Jeau

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  22. Im like this too... And my boyfriend might be like your husband. Had something similar to your story just yesterday.
    XO Jeau

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  23. @Jeau

    i was so embarrassed when i first wrote this entry. a little more comforted that im not the only crazy one now! ;)

    xx

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