deep dark hole..

im think im stuck in a rut. i feel emotionally stumped, afraid and very insecure... and there is absolutely no reason to be.

i need to dig myself out of this darkness. i need to do something i will do something.

xitao wrote in his blog about me. vaguely but it was about me. that didn't matter but what he said struck a chord. you have to believe in what you want. people attract things they believe in. and i want it very badly but im scared and i think this is the problem.

courage girl. 

im feeling very sick. yet i cant really show. and beaten down and trodden on. and i've never felt this way before. 

i need a break. but i've said it so many times and seem to get overlooked. 

i need to believe.. and i need all my positive vibes back in my life.